When the sting of death won't leave

I never know when days like yesterday and today will creep up on me. Some days it's the smell of her clothes that I brought home with me. Or her powders that I keep in my bathroom. But days like these throw me because I don't know what it is. I tell Drew that I'm missing her and the next thing I know I'm a cliche' crying in the shower.

She left us in the April when most things were springing to life and now summer's ending and those things are starting to die it's like I'm losing her all over again.

But I'll go on missing her. When I listen to Waylon, Conway, Merle, Loretta, and George and Tammy and cry like a baby. And when I see one of those insulated cups with straws in every store imaginable.

I guess the Christian thing to say is that I can be happy because I know I'll see her again but on days like these I just want her here, in front of me. I don't just want those things that remind me of her. I want her. Folded up on her couch watching the Young and the Restless asking me to heat up her coffee.